“What are we doing at the Flying B, dad?”“Well, pumpkin, you’ve done real well with old Jessie, but I think you are ready for a real horse.”We drove up to the parking area by the horse barn, and got out of the truck. Old Mr. Brewster himself met us, along with Mandy, his daughter. She is a senior at Billings High, and she is a champion barrel racer.Apparently dad knew Mr. Brewster from his rodeo days. They started talking about the old days, and Mandy took me down to the barn.“What kind of horse do you dream about, Misty?”“Well, I like to ride fast, but I really hate cows, so I have zero interest in cutting, either on the ranch, or in competition. I’ve always just wanted a nice mellow horse that likes to run. I guess in my dreams it’s a buckskin filly, with a black mane and tail.”“Have you ever thought about barrel racing? That’s a fun way to ride fast. I’ll bet all the boys would mob you after seeing your hair flying as you rounded the last barrel and raced for the finish.”“I don’t. There was a girl name Elyse. She was an artist, and I was sharing in her fascination, even fuelling it – with desperate needs borrowed from other artists I had known over time. It was a need to create beauty. That desire was so intense that she could barely manage to keep her hands from shaking with excitement as she painted.When the most dangerous of times came, I twisted her in another direction. There was a town administrator named Pascal. He was married, but still needed to be loved.I am normally very careful to avoid that one – the need for love. You see, whatever I touch in others, I've found, I develop an appetite for myself. I can always fill an appetite for fine food and material things. Sex is just as easy. With these desires, people can fill themselves, but shortly the appetite comes again. I'll always be able to find someone just a little bit desirous, and then pull it in any direction I want. But love – is much more troublesome.This was, as I wrote before, what I felt to.
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